Choose Love
This is an uncharacteristic post for me, but I felt a need to share
This morning I watched a video from the artist and YouTube creator, Kelsey Rodriguez and it broke my heart.
This young woman posts up on YouTube on a regular basis and she’s usually got nothing but good things to share with others. I don’t agree with everything she says, but I believe that comes from my life experience vs. hers.
And her life experience, especially since she’s become more popular on YouTube, is one of constant hate and bullying, typically from insecure men (or boys).
In the video below, they shame and bully her for her looks and body. They objectify her with violent, sexualized comments and diminish her at every turn.
When you hear her speak on camera, you can tell that this young artist has only recently gotten more comfortable with seeing herself on camera. Her quiet yet confident tone feels like someone who lived in the shadows most of her life and finally found a community that supports her as she deserves… except there are the trolls.
After watching the video, I immediately went into Dad-Mode and felt the need to dig through the comments on all her videos to defend her honor. I wised up quickly because she was not asking for a knight in shining armor to protect her.
She’s just asking people to be human.
The worst part is that male creators like me don’t ever receive these kinds of hate comments. I get some haters now and then, but they never attack my physical being. So when I see these types of things happening to women, I can’t help but wonder who broke these young men.
There’s no excuse for these guys and their misogynistic behavior, but I’m willing to bet that on the other end of those hate comments sits a young man who was marginalized himself, treated like trash, or worse, raised to be an entitled prick.
Regardless, this hate toward her is inexcusable, and the only way I believe I can truly help is to raise my son to be respectful of humans, especially women. I’m not the perfect teacher, but I’ll do the best I can.
That painting above is from a small series I just created, Choose Love, inspired by Kelsey and her video. They won’t be available until after the 16th of this month, but if you’re in the greater Los Angeles area and want to pop down to Long Beach, you can come to see them in person (Oct. 15-16th) during the Long Beach Open Studio Tour.
Talk to you soon,
Dave
Love is all you need!
This is a big concern for me, I've found matters of skepticism, hate born of envy & most crucially, Gender "politics."
It's so EASY to just be a negative, hateful reactionary troll. It's far more difficult to get up every day & consciously decide "I am going to make someone, somewhere, feel seen or loved." (These are often the same thing).
It's difficult enough for me to deal with the negativity as an adult male. I've had a small taste of the sort of things women have to deal with & by comparison, some of my Peers would probably stroll through the negativity I attract, since the s**t they deal with is constant.
It constantly ANAZES me that women years junior to me, often enough to be my own daughters, are blazing trails & standing tall on the "battlefield," rallying the forces of good in a manner reminiscent of a strange combination of Joan of Arc & the Duke of Wellington.
I understand completely what you describe as "dad mode," despite not being a parent.
Often though, these women don't need me to solve anything, they simply need to feel seen & supported. So that's what I strive to do.